A Good Friday Meal with your Family

 Last year I wanted our family to do something special to prepare our hearts for Easter. A friend happened to recommend a a Good Friday "walk to the cross" meal she had done before, so I decided to recreate it for our family. Essentially, it is a charcuterie board filled with items that remind us of each event that happened the night of Good Friday. It was easy to grab everything at the store, and the kids enjoyed helping me put it together. 

The meal was so special. I laid out a blanket in the living room, brought the food in, and we all sat on the floor together. I then had different people read passages of what each food represented. When all the passages had been read, we let everyone eat. It was powerful to recount the story this way, using so many of our senses to experience the story. 

At the last minute, I decided to read the passage where Jesus washes his disciples feet. I put on worship music (we love the song "The Blessing" but this year I'm going to put on a really special song called "Jerusalem" by CityAlight). We all took turns washing each other's feet and worshipping together. Watching my children serve one another in this way was a gift. 

You'll need a towel to put under the bowl or basin with water. This year I just dumped out one of my kids toy containers, and we used that to wash each others feet in. 

All in all it was a really special bonding moment for our family to concentrate on what Jesus did for us, and how we can respond to others. I highly recommend it. 

I wanted to share the food items and verses with you. They are in the order that we read them according to the Good Friday story: 

Chocolate Coins- Judas’ betrayal, Matthew 26:14-15
Olives- Jesus’ agony on the mount of olives, Luke 22:39-46
Hershey kiss- Judas’ betrayal kiss, Luke 22:47-48
Toothpick with cheese- sword at Jesus’ arrest, Luke 22:49-53
Chicken- Peter’s Denial Luke 22:55-62
Water- Pilate washing his hands of responsibility for Jesus’ death Matthew 27:24-25
Crackers with peanut butter & pretzels- Jesus’ crown of thorns John 19:1-3
Pretzel Stick Cross- the crucifixion John 19:17-19
Salt & vinegar chips- Jesus was offered vinegar John 19:28-30

The great thing is that it was easy to grab these items at the store, and then it took very little time to prep (and the kids loved helping). I hope you will consider having a special night as a family:) Hope this is encouraging....

All About Getting an Au Pair

                     

A few years ago, right after I had our 4th child, I was struggling. My husband is a farmer and works long hours 2 seasons a year (as in leaving before we get up, and getting home after we go to bed), so I felt really alone. I had a newborn, a toddler, and was trying to homeschool my older kids. The weight of it all felt overwhelming. I knew I needed to reach out for help. 

We tried a few options, like getting babysitters, but it was a bit hit and miss. 

And then it dawned on me to look in to getting an au pair. 

So...we decided to go for it...and it was an INCREDIBLE experience for our family. If you're in a situation where this may be possible for your family, I'd love to encourage you to check it out.

Before I answer your questions below, I want to preface that this program is not for everyone. It is an investment, both financially and relationally, but one we felt like would enhance our family rhythm in great ways. Even though it comes with a cost, you'd be surprised with hose economical it is compared to babysitting! 

Questions: 

1) WHAT IS AN AU PAIR? 

And au pair is someone (usually from another country) who comes to live with your family, and helps out with child related activities...hanging with the kids, doing child related chores, etc. They essentially become part of your family! You pay them a weekly stipend, and they work 40-45 hours a week! 

2) WHERE ARE AU PAIRS USUALLY FROM? 

Au pairs can be from anywhere in the world! I actually applied to be an au pair when I was fresh out of college, and then ended up finding a job so didn't go ahead with it. Our first Au pair was from Venezuela, our second au pair was from Argentina, and our current au pair is from Madagascar! 

3) HOW DO I FIND AN AU PAIR? 

There are many au pair agencies, the biggest being Cultural Care and AuPairCare. We don't live in a metropolitan area, so the only agency that serviced our town is called Agent Au Pair. We've had a good experience with them, and have had great relationships with the au pairs we've had. 

We interviewed a lot of au pairs before picking. It is helpful to have a list of what you are hoping for, so that you can ask really good questions and get to know someone before they come. One of my main criteria is that the au pair be warm and very outgoing with our children. We looked for people who we truly connected with on the Zoom calls, and were kind and gracious to us. So far we've had very lovely au pairs! 

4) WHAT DOES YOUR AU PAIR DO?

The main reason we initially needed an au pair was to help with my little boys while I homeschooled my older children. While I was teaching, our au pair would take the little boys for a walk to the park and play with them until we were done with school. Then we would all do lunch together. Since I am still with my children most of the day, our au pair helps with child related chores around the house. Each day she works on chores like folding the kids laundry, cleaning up messes they may spill, helping them keep their rooms tidy, making food for them, etc! I will also leave my kiddos home with her when I grocery shop, or need to get some work done on my computer. 

It is really important to make a schedule each week with your au pair. We sit down every Sunday night and talk through the week, including certain events we have that week and what my expectations are for her during that time. On Tuesdays we have Bible Study in the evening, so she works 8-3, and then 1.5 hours in the evening when we are gone! 

5) WHAT IS IT LIKE HAVING SOMEONE LIVE WITH YOU? 

We love it. We've actually hosted international students in our home the last 9 years, so this wasn't anything new for us. We have 4 bedrooms upstairs that our family lives in, and then one bedroom downstairs that the au pair lives in. She is with our kiddos all day during working hours (unless she's helping around the house), and then she gets to do whatever she'd like on her off hours. On their off hours, our au pairs usually take walks downtown, call their families back home, or hang out with other au pairs in the area. So far we've had great experiences. 

6) WHAT IS THE COST?

So, most agencies charge around 20K for the year. While this absolutely is an investment (and one we probably won't continue with now that our kids are getting older), if you break down childcare costs, this actually comes out way more economical. We were paying a baby-sitter $22/hour to watch our children. And if they ONLY watched our children for 4 hours each week day morning, it costs thousands of dollars more than having an au pair work 40 hours a week. So for us, the investment made sense for the season we are in.

7) WHAT IS THE BEST PART ABOUT HAVING AN AU PAIR? 

So many things, but the top two are the extra support I receive and building such a sweet relationship!!! It is such a blessing to have another helping hand around the house.  After our first au pair had been here a few weeks, I told my husband "I don't feel stressed and behind all the time!". I was able to do one on one things with each of my children, I was able to grocery shop alone, and my kids had such a special big sister playmate! Our kids have had so much fun building relationships cross culturally, and to me that's a huge in! We have also fallen in love with our au pairs, they truly become like family. We love learning about their culture, including the food (and they often make food from their country for us!!), and cultural customs. It is a special relationship! 

8) HOW DO YOU HANDLE CONFLICT? WHAT IF IT ISN'T A GOOD FIT? 

So far, we've been able to have honest and open communication with all our au pairs and haven't needed additional help. However, if there is a conflict that can't be worked through, your au pair agency will step in and help mediate. If for whatever reason the family and au pair are not a good fit, an au pair can go into "rematch" where they will find a new family, and the family will find a new au pair. 

9) WHAT IF EXTENUATING CIRCUMSTANCES COME UP? 

This actually happened to us! 4 months in to having an au pair, we found black mold in our home. We had to move out of our home immediately, and sadly, that meant our au pair had to go as she needed to be with a family that wasn't constantly moving. So we had to say goodbye to her. We are now back in our home, and just got a new au pair!! 

10) DO AU PAIRS GO ON VACATION WITH YOUR FAMILY?

It's up to you! If you'd like them to come, they can come. We took our au pair on many vacations to the beach last year, and it was so awesome to have an extra hand! However, you can also coordinate and give them time off during that time! 

What else did I miss? Any other questions!!! Let me know! It's been such a powerful experience for us, and I'm so glad we went for it. We've made some amazing friends around the world! 

Help Exchange- An incredible resource for finding help around your home

Right after my 4th baby was born, I was struggling. I was simultaneously trying to home educate my older children, while at the same time care for my sweet babies. Added to that was a husband who was gone 12 weeks of the year working long hours on the farm. I reached a point where I knew something had to change for both my sanity, and our family's balance. 

I happened to be at the library one day with my kids when I met a new friend. This friend had a hobby farm in the next town over, and she talked about hosting people all over the world through a website called Help Exchange. 

She mentioned that anyone could sign up to be a "host" if they needed help around their home. The host would make a listing detailing the kinds of help they needed, and then put it up on the website. The responsibility of the host was to provide a room and meals for the helper. 

And simultaneously, people from around the world could sign up as "helpers". Helpers committed to working 4-5 hours a day in whatever capacity you had for them. 

You could search the website and reach out to people who you thought would be a good fit for what you needed! It was a mutual agreement! 

I immediately went home that day and made a profile (that's how desperate I was haha). 

A few weeks later, a gal from Belgium named Audrey contacted us. She was working in Canada, and wanted to come down and stay with us in California. She came for 2 months, and to say it was the most incredible experience was an understatement. 

AUDREY WAS AMAZING!!! She literally became an instant part of our family, and brought so much life and love and laughter to our home. She loved our children, baked and cooked delicious meals from Belgium for us, helped in our garden, folded laundry, etc etc etc!! Having her stay with us was a dream come true. She became a soul sister to me, and she became a big sister to our children. 

Since then we've hosted another sweet Help Exchange "helper" named Yona from France. She was also an incredible gift to our family, and blessed us tremendously in a very hard season. 

I've also passed this info on to friends and family who have also used the platform! My friend Kristen who has 4 children and lives Georgia has used it multiple time with great success. 

I know this option is not for everyone, but it has been really lovely situation for us. We like it because there is not money involved (which helps financially), but also, our family gets an incredible cultural experience. We get to introduce someone to American culture, while at the same time learning about their culture. 

Most of these exchanges are short term, so it makes it easy to try out! 

Would you do this? What question do you have? I hope this was helpful for you:) 

Check Help Exchange out HERE!  

Tomorrow I'll be sharing all about having an au pair in our home, stay tuned:) 

5 Favorite Biographies that Changed my Life

In seasons of hardship and trial, I find that reading biographies of faithful men and women is one of the most important ways I can keep the faith and keep perspective. Sometimes it is so hard to see outside of our circumstances, and diving in to the life of those who persevered through chaotic and evil times helps hold me up within my own set of challenges. Each of these met me in a time of great pain, and through their faith, I was buoyed in my own. 

When I say I was changed by the stories of these men and women, I mean it! Praying they will encourage you in great way! 

1. The Hiding Place by Corrie Ten Boom

Corrie has been my lifelong hero since I was a little girl. My mom first read this to me as a girl, and I've reread it about every 5 years or so, always walking away refreshed and encouraged by her great trust in the Lord amidst much evil. Corrie's family hid Jews during WWII and were finally betrayed to the Gestapo and put in a concentration camp. Corrie survived the camp and lived to tell about the amazing miracles she saw during this time. 

2. Tramp for the Lord by Corrie Ten Boom

I have most recently read Corrie's follow-up book to the Hiding Place, called Tramp for the Lord. In it, Corrie talks about how God took her all over the world after WWII, speaking of God's great love and forgiveness to people all over the world. One particular story has her coming eye to eye with a guard in the concentration camp, and having to trust the Lord to help her forgive him. It's a powerful book. 

3. Evidence Not Seen by Darlene Deibler Rose 

This book wrecked me in a powerful way. A young Darlene set out to be a missionary to Papau New Ginnea in the late 1930's, eventually getting caught up in the fight for the Pacific during WWII. She is captured and put in a POW camp, and the stories of her time there are miraculous. I walked away with tears in my eyes at how faithful our God is! 

4. A Chance to Die by Elisabeth Elliot

This book follows the life of Amy Carmichael, a young women from England who hears God's call for missions and obeys. She travels by boat to Asia, eventually ending up in India where she starts the  Dohnavur Fellowship, a home for young girls who have been abandoned or who have been rescued from being sold to the temple. Her dedication, love and perseverance still impacts me to this day. 

5. Any Biography from the series called Christian Heroes, Then and Now by Janet & Geoff Benge

 (But especially the one on George Muller) 

Christian Heroes, Then and Now is a whole series of missionary biographies written by Janet and Geoff Benge. I collect them to read to my children, but I am always the one crying when I read them. They are SO good. Their book on George Muller is especially incredible. George Muller started orphanages in England, and through the miracles of God, fed and clothed and sent children to school. He never asked for a penny, and God always provided! I came away with refreshed vision to truly PRAY for the needs of my children and my community after reading this one! 

Now it's your turn friend! I'd love to hear some of the biographies that are ministering to your heart!!